I’m on my iPad so forgive and typing errors. I tend to leave out letters and my iPad doesn’t catch it. Plus I sliced my pointer finger so I can’t really type.
Anywho, can I take a moment? I need a moment here to whine. I know, I know, no one likes a whiner. And being anything but positive isn’t helpful. But this is my blog and I can whine if I want to, whine if I want to, whine if I want to! (See what I did there?! Lol)
I try and be a positive person… Right now I’m positive that I suck. 😛 Isn’t that awful to say? Hahaha. Funny. But not so funny. I’m just frustrated. And I knew it was coming. My friend who challenged me to do the P90X mentioned that this was going to come. My wall. Stupid wall. Today is Week 7 Day 1 of the P90X challenge and I’ve managed to lose a very insignificant amount of weight. I measured today and I’m down 2 inches around my waist. Meh.
The positive side of my brain knows any loss is fantastic! It sure is better then gaining! And just getting this far in the program is great. Not to mention, that I eat vegan 90%-95% of the time. All the time. That’s total rock star! Woo-freakin-hoo.
But the negative side of my brain is louder tonight. 52lbs down but i know the next 48lbs are going to take for.ever. Since last Monday I’ve tried to ‘eat clean’ (whatever that means?? I’m still figuring it out) and its freakin hard!!! Little to no oil, no grains. Focus on veggies, fruit, nuts, seeds. I’m ending up thinking about food all the time! What am I going to cook today? What about a snack? Thinking about all the foods I can’t have that I want to have (cheese cake, anyone?). Or about the foods I can have but now I don’t want them. Ahhhh. It’s tiring. Add in all of my other responsibilities… I’m so tired.
It would be easier to quit. To justify that I’ve already done a great job so, eh, it’s ok. Don’t get all the way to my goal, who cares! I’ve done good so it’ll be fine to stop now.
I have so far to go. I don’t know if I can do it. What if I never get there. 😦
(Can someone bring me a slice of pizza?? …If you love me… Or a cookie, I’d accept a cookie too!)