New Blog, New Me

Posts tagged ‘bible’

How to make the best choice?

I can’t sleep! Everyone else is tucked in their nice, warm beds snoozing away and I’m on the computer typing. What a shame, not being able to sleep should not be one of the problems that a mom has. Its not fair, really. Lol. I kind of did it to myself though, the husband fixes an amazing cup of coffee and I made the mistake of having some later this afternoon. So now I’ve got a coffee buzz – but no sleep!

Something has been bothering me… What do you do when you know you’re about to make the wrong choices but you consciously do it anyways? Like that stupid cup of coffee. I knew good enough that it would keep me up later tonight then what I wanted to but I went ahead and had it anyways. (But really, mama needed her caffeine. Ha.) Or when you peruse the cookie isle at the grocery store, knowing that it wont do you any good to stand there – but you do it anyways. Then you get home and find that somehow the Oreo’s managed to find their way home with you. Woops. Did you know the serving size is 2 Oreo’s? Really. Who eats just 2?! Not me. Ever. I might have good intentions to eat just 2 but then I look down and have eaten 2 whole sleeves.

There is this constant battle between knowing what is good for you and actually doing it. I talk about this with my 10 year old all of the time but it applies to me just as much. I’ll tell him that in any situation you’re faced with you’re always going to be presented with several different choices – so pick the best choice. Best choice: Buying the bag of Oreo’s that I know I will inhale? No. Buy the bag of apples instead. Best choice: Drink the coffee because I’m so tired and grumpy and have seemingly convinced myself that I cant function without it, even at 5:oo in the afternoon? No. Drink a huge glass of water or decaf green tea and deal with no caffeine.

Which brings me to my point. Picking the best choice by exhibiting some self control and discipline. Prov 25: 28 “A person without self-control is like a city with broken-down walls.”

It is easier said then done but the more you practice it – the better you’ll get at it. Im talking to myself here. No late afternoon coffee pick-me-ups anymore. :/ Sad but I know its not whats best for me. They get me jittery, cant fall asleep until late, and then I wake up late. Which throws off my whole day. Which just sends me back to the late afternoon coffee pick-me-ups. Instead of cutting it out completely, I’m going to choose to replace it with some (decaf) hot tea.

I’m starting a PiYo Challenge group the day after Labor Day. I ❤ PiYo and what it did for me the first time I tried it so I’m ready to see similar results again this time (increased strength, inches lost, smaller stomach, more flexible). I can not wait to do it in a challenge group form, working it with some friends and being inspired by their hard work will be amazing! But my number one thing that must happen – I’ve got to get out of bed in the mornings. Early. I want to have time to get the workout in before the kids are up and before the busyness of my day starts.

I really hate waking up early, ask anyone who knows me and they will tell you – do not even come at me before 9am. LOL! However, for this PiYo Challenge Im going to really put my self control in check. Along with eating clean and daily exercise .. Waking up at 6:30am (that pains me to say). Doing my normal morning routine, plus adding in the work out. And then cutting the crap in the late afternoon so that I am in bed at a decent hour. No more of this 1-2am nonsense. Working at mastering self control and discipline because I already know what the best choice is – but actually doing it is the hard part.

prov 25 self control


How do you handle hardships?

I know it might sound crazy but I actually have some free time! The hubby took 2/3 of the children to the gym, while the I stayed at home with our napping baby. Honestly I was not feeling like being too productive today! I just spent the past 20 mins coloring. Yes thats right, coloring. Sure there are 50 million other things I could be doing right now but I am choosing to have productive-less free time. (And it feels good!) Im a little apprehensive for this particular post but something is bothering me, and on my mind and I feel this push to put it out there. (Lord, is that you?) It is friday night, after all, so Im betting most people are busy and this wont be read by a lot of people (wishful thinking?).

Earlier this afternoon I had an appointment at the eye doctor where I was examined to determine if I am a candidate for the LASIK procedure. This is something Ive wanted to do for over 10 years now but I had to wait until my vision had stabilized and for me to not be pregnant! Lol. Im hopeful that now is my time because I am blind, my contact rx is -7.5 so pretty much, without correction I see nothing. Everything is fuzzy.

So the point of this post… while the doctor was examining my left eye he noticed that there is a scar. He questioned me to try and figure out where it might have come from: Had ever had an infection. Nope. Had I ever been in an accident? Nope. Had I ever had surgery? Nope. Had my husband ever given me a black eye? (Juuuust kidding!) Nope! … Had I ever had trauma to the eye? … Well that is the question I could not answer and the source of my uneasiness.

I remember very little about my life before 6th grade. I try but it just does not come easy, its mostly snippets like in a photograph. Bits of information that I feel is real but I cant quite say for certain. Ever find yourself in a conversation and in mid-sentence, you forget a word? The word is on the tip of your tongue but you just cant think of it…  Its there – but not there. Thats what my childhood memories are like. Everything is fuzzy.

The trauma that occurred to my eye, the scar that might prevent me from getting this corrective vision procedure that Ive been wanting since I was 18, more then likely was caused sometime during that fuzzy time. For when I was a baby through my early childhood I was abused by my biological mother. Soon after I was born my biological father left and I was in her care, she was a dangerous woman and had no motherly bone in her body. Im not
really sure why or how someone could show anything except love to their child but she did not; I was exposed to physical harm and was abandoned. Thankfully my grandparents (her parents) were aware of her treatment and I came to live with them at 16 months old. My parents did everything they legally could to protect me but she was granted visitation during the weekends; knowing that she would more then likely hurt me in some way they had no choice but to abide by the court and let me go. Finally after -years- of hard evidence from the abuse/mistreatment and from the recommendation of my guardian ad litem, the courts took her rights away and legally stripped her from being my mother! Safe at last, my parents changed my last name and we moved away.

I know the details of what happened only from the memories of my parents and family members who also fought for my well being. I think its for the best that I do not remember most of my childhood and now I don’t really think about my past at all, I prefer the fuzzy memories over the alternative. Today though, it was all thrown into my face.

I was definitely shaken today, I wasn’t expecting to hear that I potentially wouldn’t be able to get LASIK because of the trauma suffered when I was a child. I was upset over the news I got and automatically wanted to vent about it, I came home and tried talking to my hubby but afterwards I still didn’t feel any better. It wasn’t until I realized, wait a minute I haven’t even prayed about this! and actually did pray that I was able to gain the right perspective. We all go through difficult circumstances, we have struggles and hardships. Hopefully we are able to overcome them and move past but even then, they can still creep back up into your life. What’s important is how you deal; Matthew 11:28 “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” Lord promises us that He will be our source of comfort, encouragement, and heal our broken hearts.


What was my why again?

The baby just woke up from his nap, in my arms, so forgive me for any errors. Typing with a wiggly 8 month in your arms isn’t exactly an easy task however, I had something on my mind and decided Id better type it down before I talk myself out of typing this. Its not an easy thing to talk about but I know if Im struggling, someone else is too so maybe this is something you need to hear as well…

Going from someone who never exercised or wasn’t concerned with what food I was putting into my body – to someone who is really active and now refuses to eat meat, even Im amazed at the changes Ive seen. I feel more confident and stronger! Im ready to kick each day’s butt. But then when life throws a curve ball, its humbling and reminds me of why I even started this process. My family! I want to be able to give 100% of myself to my family, to be an active part of my children’s lives, and to live a long life with my husband. And simply put, I cant do that if I don’t take care of myself.

This all smacked me in the face over the weekend. I got a phone call on Saturday night: my beloved mama is in the ER, she is having stomach pains, something about her colon dying, and shes going to have emergency surgery. The exact details of the situation then were fuzzy but we knew it was serous. Um, what? What did you just say?! My mother? No, it cant be.. my mama is super woman. Shes like the Energy Bunny + Martha Stewart. She goes constantly, her house is immaculate, she takes care of everyone, never stops and multi-tasks like a pro, and whenever she does get sick- you still cant knock her down. This woman has gone through so much in her life and she just picks herself up and keeps going. She started her Saturday with some shopping at Kohls and she ended her Saturday with having some 11 inches of her colon removed.

Visiting her in the hospital, seeing her laying in the bed after such an invasive emergency surgery, hardest thing in my life that Ive had to do. Hands down. Shes so strong but to see her so weak, it was heartbreaking. And to hear how serious the situation was, if she had not gotten to the hospital for them to do the surgery in time and her colon ruptured, she would have died. My mom has always been pretty healthy but if circumstances were different, she might not be here with us.

My family has been blessed, in that my mom is doing fantastic! Her recovery is going slow but shes doing such a good job, even the nurses have commented about how great of a patient she’s been. Which is not unexpected news because she will not let this get her down, I told her I bet she will be running laps around the hospital! My mom makes emergency surgery look like a piece of cake. God is good and He most definitely answered our prayers.

Im the first to admit that I have not always been health conscious. My young adult life was spent figuring out this marriage, college, and mom thing so taking care of myself was not important to me, at all. Ive shared before … the result of those decisions landed me with my priorities out of whack, pretty unhappy about myself, and according to that stupid BMI chart, in the “obese” weight range (omgosh, I hate admitting that- but its true). I finally got to the point where the Lord showed me, “ cant continue like this!” So ever since summer of 2013 when I cut meat out of my diet, Ive determined to do something about it.

It sounds kind of trite to say but on Saturday I was hit right in the face with how important my health really is, a needed reminder of why I started this process. To be there for my family. Change is never easy, nor is it quick. Sometimes there are challenges you have to face or you might get a little off track. Such a decision requires you to totally change your way of thinking, your relationship with foods, your way of living, and you reevaluate your priorities. But keeping your focus and remembering your why will help you succeed. To be there completely for my family, yeah, Id say this change is totally worth it.

strength bible


Are You Ready?!

How many of y’all set New Years resolutions? How have your resolutions gone? Kept them? Broke them after a week?! Lol. Mine have gone wonderfully… because I didn’t make any! 😛 Hahaha. But for this ‘New Me’ I think it’s about time. I did have weight loss goals but I kinda slacked off. I make them before I became a veg. So I’ll update to fit in with my new life. Along with weight I also want to add in a few other general goals. Not only do I want to get healthy and look über hot with my new bod, 😉 I also want to be well rounded in all areas of my life. Neglecting duties in other areas won’t make me ‘healthy’, it’ll just make me a skinner person who’s priorities are out of whack.

All Things ARE Possible
All Things ARE Possible

So my goals:
Weight loss. I’m going to do Weigh-in-Weds. Self explanatory, every Wed I’m going to log my weight loss. I don’t feel comfortable logging that info here…not yet… But I’ll tell how many pounds I’ve lost (hopefully lost and not gained). My goal is to lose the rest of the baby weight before Christmas. When I lose the next 10 lbs I’m going to buy a Pandora charm that represents my son. When I lose the rest of my baby weight I’m going to buy a charm that reps my daughter. I’ll revisit my next goals at the end of the year. I know I’m DEFIANTLY going to add a spa day in there. Massage. Facial. Ooooh YES!!

Jesus!! 🙂 even though I’ve listed this ‘goal’ second… It’s really my primary focus. We use to go to church all of the time but since Bethany has been born we haven’t gone as much. She doesn’t sleep at night very well and it’s hard to wake up in the mornings. In stead we just watch the services online, which is *OK* but you cant connect or serve others. Even if it means showing up late, lookin like a hot.mess. going to church is so much better then not going. I’m also starting 2 bible studies. Daily bible reading and being active in the bible studies!! In the past I’ve found that these are best accomplished when you have someone to hold you accountable. One of my BFFs (Julie) will be my partner.

Exercise. I have never been big into exercising. You know, start something and quit, thats me! Going to the gym lasted for a little but I felt ridic, I had no idea what I was doing. It gets frustrating. Not working out is a nasty habit that I’ve never been able to break. ‘They’ say that to learn a new habit you have to do it for a month straight. Soooo… :/ Bleh… Work out for a month straight. Noooot exactly looking forward to this goal. 30 mins a day. I plan to start by going on walks with Bethany. Add yoga 2 days a week. And I’ve thrown the idea around of starting karate. My girl, Julie, is also going to help me stick to it! Exercise will be the hardest.

Those are the 3 major things. There are a few smaller goals I have but I dont want to bore you with details. Cleaning. Drinking Water. Making dinner and only going out to eat once a week. I’m sure the husband would love for me to add ‘stop spending money’ and ‘stop spending so much time on my iPad’ but…. a girls got to have fun sometime!!! 😀 Riight?!

Are you excited?! Cuz I know I sure am!! Woot. New Blog, New Me. Btw, so far I’ve lost 10 pounds. This morning I worked out for 40 mins (had to work off my Starbucks breakfast.. :/ Naughty!). I also read my bible. I read before I really started my day which I think is the perfect time for me because then I have the whole day to meditate on what I read. Luke 1:37 totally hit me in the face! Thanks, Lord! Perfect….

Luke 1:37 For nothing will be impossible with God.

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